To friend,about my grandfather..

I went to take care of my grandfather today ,he is still unconscious. But accroding to my mother's statement, he is better than couple days ago. Sometimes he is awake,sometimes not. Most of time he speaks nonsense. There was a moment,he woke up and talked to me but he cannot recognize me. Though he was a bit confused with who I am ,I kept talk to him . Then I asked him if he wanna sleep he said yes ,so I kissed his forehead. Suddently he remembered me, I think that's becuase I am the only one person who always kiss him goodbye everytime when visit him . I supposed be very scared cuz I don't like see lives in pain or lonely,dying or heavy sick. It makes my heart feels hurt as well and makes me think about death. I know "death" is true thing but I don't wanna believe it so in my deep mind, I refuse to accept anything relate to death. But today,I sit in the hospital looking at my grandfather, Im not too scared. I was thinking about his life- the amazing 100 years. I know he loves my grandmother very very much even she is not in this world anymore. Before he fell, he had good memory even when to meet my grandmother,when to get married. But now, he almost remembers nothing. His looking was full of confusion and sorrows while I asked him what he should remember in usual. I found it "Memory" is just like a knife sticking into our body slowly. It causes feeling to make us feel alive. Once it be pulled out,no matter slowly or quickly,it's painful ! I am thinking about my grandfather's "knife," it's a 100-year-old knife and he's losing it... I wanna help him but only can do few. I don't know him too much and he's almost blind and deaf ,besides, he feels tired to listen to us even I wanna talk to him.it's quite difficult to chat with a 100-year-old unconscious old man.... I will see him tomorrow and I hope he is recovering well. Best regards, Airy.